Tuesday 17 April 2012

Top Lessons In Male Friendship From The American Pie Movies


1.Always Support Your Friends No Matter How Insane They Seem
Most friends would probably adios from the guy who constantly embarrasses himself in public, yet Jim was lucky enough to have friends who stuck around.

2. Allow your dad to be your friend
If your dad (like Jim's) would stick by you after catching you humping a pie or encourages you to have sexual relations with a foreign exchange student - thats a friend right there!

3. Rule of thumb: Always knock!
For guys, a closed door often means that privacy is required. Take for eg the pie-humping scene - discovered by opening a door at the wrong time.

4. Do not cross the line with your friend's mum no matter how hot the MILF.
It’s important to remember that it’s a bad idea.

5.Avoid catchphrases - You don’t want to be the Kevin of your group unless you want your friends to mock your catchphrase and snicker between themselves whenever you try to slip it into conversations.

6. Bro's before Ho's
Finch and Stifler competed over Michelle’s sister in American Wedding and Finch slept with Stifler's mum - they probably would have been best buddies if not for the chicks between them.

7. Don't Spread Rumors About Your Friends
Remember Finch’s “big penis” rumor that gets him attention from the ladies or Finch beating up Stifler that leads to the man seeking laxative-based revenge - never works out!

8. Never Create Your Own Nickname
That's just downright pathetic. Take the "Sherminator," for example. When he referred to himself in the third person as the "Arnold Schwarzenegger of lovin’," that reached new levels of pathetic.

Sourced from askmen.com

Tuesday 27 March 2012

Top 10 types at the gym



Anyone who works out on a regular basis at gym surely spends many hours people-watching while pumping iron.

The most noticeable types are these:

1. The Maggot Gagger
This type is reserved for Men only - us guys somehow can conjure up the most horrid smells, but some more than others. The smell can ward away the women  - it has the same effect as garlic to vampires. Not cool - these okes need to be escorted into a special room at the gym and hosed down.

2. The Compensating For Something blokes
These are the peeps who travel in packs of 3-5. Their sole idea of gyming is to lift the heaviest weight possible whilst their friends gaze at them, bewildered. These are the okes if asked about the correct lifting technique, would answer: "What's that?"

3. Mrs Cougar
These are the female type who are at gym only because they are on the prowl for fresh meat. Don't get me wrong...they look freaking fantastic albeit most of them is pretty much plastic and they have been nipped and tucked to death.

4. The Diva
This spring chicken is yet to experience the wrath of ageing. She is somewhat ethereal, you could swear you hear angels singing when she walks by. She "gyms" for about 15 mins - nothing too strenous as she must not break into a sweat...soiling her expensive gym clothes is not happening. Not to mention, ruining her makeup is a No-No! She does not make eye contact with anyone, and tunes everyone out with her ipod.

5. The Screamers
These are the guys who sound like they are giving birth when they are doing their routine.

6. The TMI guys
These guys were so much spandex you'd swear they had shares in the product. With this gym outfit, no imagination is necessary. This is wrong in so many ways!

7. The Tsunami
This guy shows up already sweaty to the gym - not to be confused with The Maggot Gagger.

8. The Wife Beater
This is the guy wearing a snug, white, ribbed tank top a la Kevin Federline.

9. The Beef Cakes
These guys are all about bulk. Their muscles even have muscles!

10. The Just Shut the Hell Up Already-er
This one is pretty self-explanatory. If they spent as much time working their muscles as they did their jaws, then they’d be huge.

Sourced from askmen.com

Thursday 26 January 2012

Top 10 tongue twisters


1. Swan swam over the sea, Swim, swan, swim! Swan swam back again Well swum, swan!

2. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, and chuck as much wood as a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

3. She sells sea shells by the sea shore. The shells she sells are surely seashells. So if she sells shells on the seashore, I'm sure she sells seashore shells.

4. A big black bug bit a big black bear and made the big black bear bleed blood.

5. Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?

6. A Tudor who tooted a flute tried to tutor two tooters to toot.Said the two to their tutor, "Is it harder to toot or to tutor two tooters to toot?"

7. Silly Sally swiftly shooed seven silly sheep. The seven silly sheep Silly Sally shooed shilly-shallied south. These sheep shouldn't sleep in a shack; sheep should sleep in a shed.

8. The sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick.

9. Mr. See owned a saw. And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw Before Soar saw See, which made Soar sore.

10. Betty Botter had some butter, "But," she said, "this butter's bitter. If I bake this bitter butter, it would make my batter bitter. But a bit of better butter-- that would make my batter better."

Wednesday 18 January 2012

Top 10 celebs and their strange phobias


1. Billie Bob Thorton – Panophobia, fear of antique furniture. The actor told Oprah Winfrey: "Maybe it’s a past-life thing and I got beat to death with some old chair. I don’t really know. But anyway … I’m totally serious. And I can’t eat around antiques.”

2. Alfred Hitchcock – Ovophobia, fear of eggs. The director’s assistant once said: “He hates eggs.”

3. Marilyn Monroe – Agoraphobia, fear of public or open places. This seems to be a strange phobia for an actress, but hey, another blond bombshell, Kim Basinger, had the very same fear.

4. Natalie Wood – Aquaphobia, fear of water. When she was young, she had to cross a bridge in a movie scene. It was set to collapse but her mother lied to her and said it was safe.

5. Johnny Depp – Clourophobia, fear or clowns. Depp once told the media: “Something about the painted face, the fake smile. There always seemed to be a darkness lurking just under the surface, a potential for real evil.”

6. John Madden – Aerophobia, fear of flying. This sports announcer makes sure he travels by road rather than air all the time. 

7. Christina Ricci – Botanophobia, fear of indoor houseplants. Ricci explains: “They are dirty. If I have to touch one, after already being repulsed by the fact that there is a plant indoors, then it just freaks me out.”

8. Madonna – Brontophobia, fear of thunder. The singer should never come to Johannesburg in the summer, those thunderstorms will leave her scarred for life! 

9. Howard Hughes – Mysophobia, fear of germs. So bad was his fear that he once wore tissue boxes on his feet to protect them from germs. 

10. Sigmund Freud – Siderodromophobia, fear of train travel. On a train journey he saw gas jets for the first time and said it looked like souls burning in hell.